Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
