I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
