she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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