Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
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