The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Randomize
