Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
smell my finger.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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