What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
