So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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