Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."

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  (586): I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope." http://tfl.nu/2m2o
  Replies (36) Good night (845) Bad night (3777)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey

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  (850): One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey http://tfl.nu/owfj
  Replies (45) Good night (712) Bad night (2601)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.

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  (515): Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs. (402): but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs. http://tfl.nu/7170
  Replies (9) Good night (3815) Bad night (764)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport

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  (313): awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport http://tfl.nu/bmz0
  Replies (25) Good night (5037) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.

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  (914): Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life. http://tfl.nu/7q9y
  Replies (7) Good night (1288) Bad night (3159)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them

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  (219): rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them http://tfl.nu/zf3d
  Replies (209) Good night (63278) Bad night (2649)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.

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  (928): she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college. http://tfl.nu/99x7
  Replies (50) Good night (9325) Bad night (1232)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.

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  (210): I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you. http://tfl.nu/z9fg
  Replies (34) Good night (1247) Bad night (13379)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?

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  (508): Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"? http://tfl.nu/9ial
  Replies (29) Good night (1028) Bad night (2942)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  that actually explains a lot

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  (847): you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night (1-847): that actually explains a lot http://tfl.nu/hgfk
  Replies (3) Good night (1632) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.

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  (910): I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything. http://tfl.nu/veiz
  Replies (9) Good night (1766) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.

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  (706): I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today. http://tfl.nu/vvd3
  Replies (10) Good night (2166) Bad night (648)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.

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  (506): Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it. http://tfl.nu/c7ua
  Replies (5) Good night (511) Bad night (671)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.

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  (678): Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty. http://tfl.nu/d492
  Replies (5) Good night (817) Bad night (413)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen

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  (614): He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen http://tfl.nu/pfpx
  Replies (1) Good night (424) Bad night (189)

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