Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.

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(212): View more from New York

Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!

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(205): View more from Alabama

we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.

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(818): View more from California

he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came

(323): View more from California

i love that song!

(818): View more from California

NOT THE POINT

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(508): View more from Massachusetts

Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone

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(619): View more from California

Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.

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