I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
We left the knife in your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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