There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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