just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
