does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
