i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
