I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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