there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
