too bad you live with your parents still
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she smelled like a LAN party
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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