What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
