I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
