Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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