Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
