Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
