question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
