she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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