I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Randomize
