marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
