At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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