are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
