I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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