Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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