Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
third nipple confirmed
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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