He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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