I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Your dad touched me again.
Say something about gay babies.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize