well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Your penis caused this!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
