so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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