I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
