My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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