Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
