Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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