Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
