I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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