smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.