can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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