hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
smell my finger.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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