Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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