I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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