You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize