You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
vagina is talking i cant
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Such a big mess for such a small penis
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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