I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
3 2 1 whiskey
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
