Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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