Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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